Fox and Shadow (SCRAPPED VER.) (NEEDS CRITIQUES PLEASE)

[AzuelZorro102]

Old story, scrapped version, comment what you think, yeah, yeah, yeah....

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The air held a light breeze, along the horizon, and the forest was teeming with wildlife of all sorts, even many unknown to that of mankind. The trees; mainly oak and maple, stood tall and proud; managing to.tower over any other plants that were close by. A family of mice hid in the underbrush; the mother hinting at the air for any signs of danger before stepping cautiously out into the open expanse of a nearby meadow.

The air was cool, and refreshing; and a young vixen fox croutched against the direction of the wind, so that the mother field mouse nor any of her offspring could sense her scent. The vixen was about to pounce; before her attention shifted to a field-hare rabbit, just nearby.
The vixen's ears flicked as a sudden raindrop fell from overhead. All of the animaos nearer the forest scurried into safety of the shadows; but the fox stayed where she was. She looked up at the sky, accidently getting rain into her eyes, causing her to blink. The watter stung in her eyesbbut she ignored it, looking back down at the ground and waited until her vision went clear, before silently slinking into the forest trees.
/Maybe next time.../ she thought, growling under her breath.
The vixen, named Sokoi; had been with child for severak weeks now and she was desperate to find food-nourishment- for the unborn cub.
She knew by severe, almost overpowering instinct that she has, absolutely has too find food soon, if her cub--cubs, even-- were going to have a chance to pass on her bloodline.
"Come on, Sokoi...you....n-need to....rest..." she told herself, finally getting within pawsteps of her nursing den--her and her mate had stolen it from a badger-skunk earlier in the year.
But sadky Kumuka couldn't be here for the joyous occasion if a Birthing; he had been called by one of the Great Gods, Vulpes, to be a sacrificial Warrior in the upcoming war between the Ellfa forest creatures and the Creatures of Great Darkness; or in modern times, shadow creatures. But to most they ar simply know as Hell's Deamons.
Sokoi found herself cringing and doubling over in pain as a sudden shot up her shine occured. "Ah-hrm...!" She growled, an instinctive thought coming to mind, and it scared her. /C-could he be one of the forbidden Shadaia?!/ she shuddered, "P-please, Vulpes...no.." she whispered to herself, in the comforting semi-darkness of her den. Every living creature that was able to think for itself feared the Shadaia.
The Shadaia were an elite group of shadow creatures; a step up from the regular demon, or as mentioned before, a 'deamon' in Ancient speak. Members of the Shadaia were known for their cruel nature; willingly wanting whenever they had the chance to brutally and messily rip anyone who apposed them apart; and they held little to no mercy for those who inhabited the little Ellfa region.
Except, there were some who came to worshipping the Shadaia; and those who did were either severly punished by being changed into shadows themselves or, by means of death, they were sent to a literal bloody Hell. Bliod everywhere, seriously.
Quite a harsh punishment for those few looking to stray away from the ways of the Great Gods; those being Lupus, god of the WolfPack; Vulpes, god of Foxclan; and the great Unknown One, rumored to have created all of Ellfa.
Shadaia are a race of highly intelligent, highly mobile species; they worked together as a team; if not canniballizing each other. In the past they have been known to have the strength and willpower to destroy whole villages, cities, communities, even fortresses and whole kingdoms burned down to the ground, all in a day. Harsh.