Tonki The Tyrant

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MothballMilkshake
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Tonki The Tyrant

Post by MothballMilkshake »

Gather ‘round children – oh, adults too!
For I’ve a horrid tale to share with all of you.
About a hapless mage (or witch)
Who used to run this Keep
She frightened the then children,
The staff, the maids, the krakens deep.

Tonki Wheystone was her name,
A lass from country fair.
Came to the keep to learn to cast –
But wouldn’t stop just there.

When told she lacked required skills
To progress further in her work
She took to the lake and made a scene
Called to the depths where creatures lurk.

From the lake there rose a sound
An awful noise – a wail, a screech!
And to this day
No soul can say
What creature took the beach

It took her hated teacher
Down to the briny depths
She turned to the crowd,
Put on a smirk
Then calmly asked, ‘who’s next?’

The teachers all were silent
The students quite near tears
And on her face there rose a smile
“Yes, I think I’ll stay some years.”

With threats of hurt, or death – or worse!
She quickly rose in rank
Till head-mage became her title
And all who met her shrank.

Of course it should be noted
Her lessons she forgot
Till casting, t’was a hassle
And the people, they did plot.

Old Wheystone, she did crumble
Under the sudden rush
Of students, teachers, servants too
Who wished to see her crushed.

Her monster could not save her
She couldn’t call in time
So learn what you can from Tonki Wheystone
About whom they made this rhyme.

One mage can beat one mage, it’s true
One mage might then beat two

But when the crowd all comes together…
United for a common goal
No creature, spell, or nasty weather
Can save a tyrants soul.
Last edited by MothballMilkshake on January 17th, 2015, 5:42:48 am, edited 1 time in total.
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Re: Tonki The Tyrant

Post by Merkwerkee »

Well, colour me impressed. I like the meter of the thing
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Re: Tonki The Tyrant

Post by Feuerfresser »

Wow, that's amazing



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Re: Tonki The Tyrant

Post by Blazen749 »

Great job Moth!
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Re: Tonki The Tyrant

Post by ElementalNovel »

This was really neat! It almost reads like a nursery rhyme. ^_^ Good job!
T I M S H E L ImageImageImageBut this- this is a ladder to climb to the stars...
I have a new love for that glittering instrument, the human soul.
It is a lovely and unique thing in the universe.
It is always attacked and never destroyed— because "Thou mayest."
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Re: Tonki The Tyrant

Post by StormCry »

This is so awesome! I would love to see more like this! It's very mother goose-ish - perfect for kids. (Maybe "Mother Platypus" would be a magistream book for children? :P )
The only thing I saw that gave me pause was "Then calmly said, ‘who’s next?’"... maybe "said" should be changed to "asked"??
I'm not much of a poet, so I really don't know.
Otherwise, it is perfect. *thumbs up*
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Re: Tonki The Tyrant

Post by MothballMilkshake »

StormCry wrote:This is so awesome! I would love to see more like this! It's very mother goose-ish - perfect for kids. (Maybe "Mother Platypus" would be a magistream book for children? :P )
The only thing I saw that gave me pause was "Then calmly said, ‘who’s next?’"... maybe "said" should be changed to "asked"??
I'm not much of a poet, so I really don't know.
Otherwise, it is perfect. *thumbs up*
Thanks :) Changed that one!
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Re: Tonki The Tyrant

Post by Solstice »

Wow, that was really awesome. I liked the part about her summoning the monster from the lake and how no one knew what it was. I wonder if that monster's still there... :P And I also liked how it sounded like a nursery rhyme for magi, telling them to study hard or else their spells will fail them.
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