MagiStream

MOD edit: To clarify the OP's post: "childfree" in this sense means that you have consciously made the decision NOT to have children for various reasons, not that you have not yet had sex or that you are yourself a child and therefore have no children. Please keep the discussion in that vein, thank you.

I'm curious as to how many people on MS (and in general) are childfree. Do you have any particular reasons for it or do you just dislike children? Are people you know accepting of this? How do you deal with people who keep asking you repeatedly if you are serious and not joking or the like? What about the lovely "you'll change your mind as you grow older"?

I'm childfree and have been for several years and for several reasons:
- I don't like children
- My genes suck
- I really, really don't want to go through pregnancy and shove a baby out of me (so if I ever want a child... I will adopt)
- I doubt my abilities to be a good parent as I am working through several issues of my own
- I don't want to have to save for a kid, to be tied down by a kid, to have 18 years of doing shit
- I do not believe the world needs more children/people; I am sort of a part of VHEMT
- I am a misanthrope so... bringing more humans into the world does not sit well with me

Unfortunately... thanks to silly evolution, my uterus twinges every now and then Thankfully I can be rational and explain to it that it is just an evolutionary need to further the species which I do not need to listen to since there are whole bunches of other humans doing it.

Edit: Some links to help explain what childfree is
http://www.happilychildfree.com/
http://www.childfree.net/

I'm pretty much the same as you (and I checked that we're of the same age, too x3), plus add the fact that I'm also emetophobic (have severe fear of vomiting) and, frankly, suck at taking care of living things, be it a houseplant or a pet.

So far I haven't been nagged by my relatives about not having children because 1) times have changed, nowadays people put more thought into getting a steady career before considering children (although everybody may have a different take on this issue), 2) I'm still at University, studying for my Master diploma, 3) I'm not in a relationship.

Although I guess that there will be a day when I'll have to tell my parents and grandmother that they shouldn't expect great-/grandchildren from this younger relative of theirs.

Admittedly, I do find toddlers cute, but wouldn't want to care for one myself. Babies - no. Just no.

Oh no, I almost got out of the Hall of Speakers to do some much needed creature growing, but this pulled me back in

And so, I shall abide...

-I am currently child free. Which is pretty much awesome, since I'm a virgin and all, haha.
-I'm not particularly fond of children, but I don't go around hating on every single one.
-Children are sticky...
-I'm not emotionally or financially prepared to care for a child.
-I'm afraid of having to push that little life-leech out of a tiny orifice... That's a very legitimate fear. C-Section scares me too (I'm a C-Section baybeh mahself).
-I have shitty genes, and so does my current boyfriend. Although he has expressed the desire to have children in the future, I think I'm going to have to convince him that adoption is the way to go.
-The world is already overpopulated. Every time I hear someone say, "I want a large family," I cringe and can't help but think how selfish that desire is. Natural, but selfish.
-I've been thinking about how much I don't want children since grade school, so this is obviously not a phase. I do, however, leave myself open to the option that I may change my mind later on. I can happen, even if it's unlikely.

I don't have any kids and I don't ever plan on having kids.

That said I'm constantly being harassed by my family to 'settle down' with a man and pop out some kids. Even if I did like kids that pressure alone would turn me off. I wouldn't mind adopting but as I dislike most children under the age of 9 I don't see that happening soon.

-Children are sticky.
-I'm lousy at keeping goldfish alive.
-I'm too spoiled and selfish to give that much of my life away to care for something I can't eat.
-They scream. And don't stop.
- But mainly if I have to raise a child I want that kid to be happy and to live a life free of the stigmas of its mom being poor and not straight.

I'm childfree for several reasons:
- I'm not married or have a relationship >.>
- I don't like children
- Pregnancy does not sound like ANY "fun"
- Children are stuck in their "annoying" phase for years (3-maybe 12 years old). At least with puppies and kittens, their annoying phase last roughly 1 year (I'm talking with kitten/puppyhood where they get into EVERYTHING).
- They're EXPENSIVE.
- 18 years of supporting them. More if they want to leech off you and you feel obligated to comply.
- I think babies are creepy. How they stare at you and start laughing for god-knows-why
- If I ever want children, I'd adopt. Not a baby, but an older child (at least 8 years old) . At least then they're pre-potty trained, are steered straight (I'm guessing orphanage/foster people want their kids to be adopted so they teach them to behave properly), and you get a few years of expenses off.


When I was a child, my parents got me stuffed animals. No human dolls. Maybe that has something to do with it.

Answers to all your questions (basically), found here under the spoiler.
Also, im male, so I cant get pregnant.

I have fairly good genes. Just diabetes, cancer, and Alzheimer's in my family. Which isnt THAT bad. But if I ever have kids, I might adopt, or have 1 or maybe 2 (maybe twins, at least twins would make them a little more self-sufficient) biological children.

I am Child-free. Thankfully I don't have any real pressure to produce kids. It's not a massive thing in my family. And I'm not the only one of my siblings either to be child-free. At 30 I can say with all certainty it is unlikely I will ever get the urge. I've never had the urge before now and I can't wait for when my period dries up.

- My temper is pretty short fused. A child would irritate me a LOT.
- I don't mind children in small doses but with extended time babysitting my niece and nephew I have discovered that any more thne a few hours would make me tear my hair out.
- I'm not actually big on children in general. Especially babies. And early teen girls.
- I have Tocophobia
- Kids are just too expensive. I wouldn't be able to afford my pets.
- I want to do something interesting with my life. Children are like lead weights.
- Overpopulation sucks.
- If I could I would get sterilised today.

1. There are too many people on earth as it is.
2. Animals are better-looking. I don't like the way babies look, they're all red and squishy and bizarre.
3. Infants creep me out, and not just their appearance. I have no idea how to act around something so helpless.
4. Stupid parents have given kids a bad rep. That said, I'd probably be a fairly good parent, but I wouldn't want my own family to be prejudiced against. Children aren't inherently evil, you know, most of the time the problem is bad parenting.

. . . I've forgotten what else I was going to say. Of course, I'm "only 16" so my opinion could still change, but I don't think that's likely.

I can't really consider myself child free by choice, since evolution and Mother Nature (knowing better than myself) took that choice from me. I suffered damage to the metabolic and endocrine systems early in life because of a brain virus and it rendered me essentially sterile. My uterus remains the size of a pre-pubescent girl's and is therefore not capable of sustaining a fetus. As my first husband was an abusive man who didn't believe in health care (at least, not for his wife), I had four early miscarriages and two stillborns in the five years we were married (he also refused to use any sort of male contraceptive, said it un-manned him).

I made the conscious decision after my little boy died in my arms (he was complete except for the fingernails and eyebrows but still not apparently viable enough to survive outside the womb) NOT to have children. While I didn't know what was wrong until much later, I took it as a sign that I should not for whatever reason be contributing to the gene pool.

Later, I wanted a family with my current husband and so we went through the process of being screened for adoption. In the state of Florida this is nothing short of an invasive ordeal. The state, it turns out, isn't looking for parents. It's looking for places to warehouse children who really ought to be helped in institutions or under close psychiatric evaluation (I do not say that lightly or through stereotyping but through experience). On the form, you clearly spell out your tolerances. I had asked for children age 11 or older. By that point in my life I knew that if I were given a small child or an infant, I would be on the other side of the judicial system instead of being a foster parent.

The first ten calls we got were for placements of toddlers and infants. We were also informed --- and I have never found this law anywhere on Florida's books so I suspect it to be a corruption on either the regional or local level --- that we had to foster before we could adopt.

We had a boy of the right age with us for almost two years. He was supposed to stay with us pending adoption but his caseworker, already in trouble for mismanaging his file and for skimming funds which should have gone to him, illegally removed him from the home and then placed him outside the state with the same relatives who abused him (I am happy to say that he's back with his parents, who don't object to his continued relationship with us. In those two years, I made an impression which allowed him to grow into a smart, funny, talented young man).

At that point, we called it quits. We told the agency...and found a pair of toddlers dumped literally on our doorstep. Remember, we'd filled out an extensive family history. Our rural location combined with my health situation and the pets we have prohibits safely keeping small ones. We knew this and that is, in part why we requested older children.

I couldn't handle the toddlers. They were terrified of the dogs (we have four). There was nothing here for them to play with and I had no idea what toddlers did for fun. In one day, they destroyed my office (and I mean destroyed --- even the wall panels had been ripped down), scattered the laundry I'd been going to wash, ground crackers and Play-Doh into the carpets, and scattered plastic blocks all over the living room. I hadn't had time to do the lunch dishes and had just set out the vegetables for dinner.

In short, it looked like your typical home inhabited by a toddler...when DCF came blazing in with armed deputies on a child welfare complaint placed by the same person who had just dumped them on the doorstep without even delivering their files.

We were charged with child endangerment and neglect and, because we're well enough off, a bunch of very offensive suggestions were made (such as putting in a POOL and hiring someone to landscape the entire five acres...this is a FARM, for gods' sake!)

We quit. I'd had it with children of any sort, adopted or otherwise.

In an ironic twist of fate, the medication the endocrinologist put me on made me fertile in my late thirties. I have begged and pleaded with the doctors to remove at least the uterus, possibly the ovaries as well since I can't carry to term and, frankly, they're all full of cysts and they hurt.

They won't do it because I "might" want children later.

I do not, for many reasons in addition to those above:

- I get impatient with anything that cannot articulate its needs. I know, in my heart of hearts, that I'd either shake a baby to death or yell and hit. Better to not create the situation in the first place.

- Between my husband and myself we have in our genes: diabetes, heart disease, cancer of the colon and kidneys, breast cancer, Ehlers-Danlos (a rare connective tissue disorder which becomes dominant and will always be passed to offspring), polycystic ovarian disease, degenerative spine disease, severe psoriasis, autoimmune disorders, alcoholism, schizophrenia, clinical depression, developmental delays, autism, and generalized anxiety disorder. That's a heck of a 'legacy' for an innocent child!

- I have an enhanced sense of smell. No matter how clean the child, I don't like how they smell. It's as aggravating to me as the smell of wet dog is to some people.

- I don't want to have to give up or rearrange my vacations to accommodate bored children or children's activities. I've gotten too used to doing things how I want them when I want them.

- We're nudists. While there's nothing technically wrong with nudity in the home, most of America sees it otherwise. I don't want to have to wear clothes all the time inside my home.

- I don't want to have to childproof my house. I like things within easy reach and unlocked. If I had children, we'd have to lock up all the small bits and the things which are adult in nature. This is an adults' home and I want it to stay that way.

- I just don't feel the need to contribute to the gene pool. I looked at adoption as a means of satisfying my need at the time for a family and at the same time giving a home to an existing child who would not have otherwise had a good home. As that's become an absolute failure, I have no desire to create my own family. I know it sounds crass, but I look at it the same way I do animal shelters: there are already too many young'uns out there without homes and, as the bureaucracy has prevented me from giving one of those a home, I don't want to create my own.

- Frankly, with my health as it is, I don't think I could do justice to a child's needs. Peers are cruel. I don't want to put a child through those questions: "How come your mom's so fat?" "Why's she in a wheelchair?" "How come your mom sleeps all the time?" "Why doesn't she ever fix your lunches/go to your games/play with you?"

I have many other reasons, but that's the bottom line. I'm content with my multitude of pets and with the adult family I have around me.

Well since I am only of the age of 17..I am totally childfree. Still a virgin and plan on being one till I am married

But even so I would not want a child. I do say I want one when Mother Nature is at my door step (girls Im sure you know what Im talking about..) but that is just the hormones and crap talking not me. They are really expensive, annoying, and you have to deal with them for 18 years in your household. Not fun. If I ever plan on having kids Ill adopt. There are too many children that are in need of being adopted.