Re: Childfree?
Posted: December 19th, 2021, 3:48:49 pm
My reasonings have always been much the same as others have posted. I'm really reassured seeing more people who are self aware enough to say "this world doesn't need more humans". That was always my first instinct and reasoning from a young age. I realize it's also a lot more than that, having dealt with an ectopic pregnancy a few years ago due to a shifted IUD. The absolute rage I went through at my body being host to a literal bomb reminded me that it's also just how vehemently I don't want anything to do with birth or raising a kid. Big picture, small picture. Both are a no.
I don't interact with family enough anymore for it to be a big social issue that I know others do deal with. I did have a really overbearing uncle, though, that gave the "you'd be a great mom" line once, but I was already in therapy at the time and calmly managed something in the vein of "that's not a reason" and "I get to decide that, and whether or not it's true is, again, not a reason". I also recognized that he, like many in my family, are the type who say what they want and ignore other peoples' responses. Things don't even go in one ear and out the other, but just, like, fly by the side of their head. They don't actually want to listen, so they don't actually care in a way that's healthy. And I don't put energy into those kinds of people anymore.
As for the "you could change your mind" line, pfft. I could also change my mind after having a kid, and then where would we be?
I don't interact with family enough anymore for it to be a big social issue that I know others do deal with. I did have a really overbearing uncle, though, that gave the "you'd be a great mom" line once, but I was already in therapy at the time and calmly managed something in the vein of "that's not a reason" and "I get to decide that, and whether or not it's true is, again, not a reason". I also recognized that he, like many in my family, are the type who say what they want and ignore other peoples' responses. Things don't even go in one ear and out the other, but just, like, fly by the side of their head. They don't actually want to listen, so they don't actually care in a way that's healthy. And I don't put energy into those kinds of people anymore.
As for the "you could change your mind" line, pfft. I could also change my mind after having a kid, and then where would we be?