Self-Injury

[AbsoluteZero]

I used to cut myself a whole lot. Made it a New Year's Resolution to stop, and I've gone a month without doing anything...so that's good.
I started a few years ago... back when I actually got on Magistream. Before my depression really started kicking in. I met all the wrong people...had all the wrong things happen to me. And eventually, I broke down and just became...addicted to cutting. Even tried to attempt suicide at one point. I just took one of the kitchen knives and started doing it. Told my mom I accidentally threw the blade away so she wouldn't go looking for it. I never did anything super deep...nothing that warranted going to the hospital or anything. But I can still see the scars and all. Nobody even realized I had cut myself. It was my (unfortunately) best kept secret.

Things got worse and...yeah. It got worse. This year has been better... I've cut myself out of all the abusive relationships I've been in and I went to a counselor and a behavioral medical center to help. But the temptations are still there sometimes. And sometimes, it takes a miracle to snap me out of the mood. :/

[ImNotOkay]

this is really late i know but i started self harm before at 7?(wait for it) no i started hitting my self and i calm down years later i guess something trigger it when i was in 5th i started digging my nails into my skin and eventually it became a habit.No one knew till 8th(now).
Right now its not as bad.During my time at my middle school i learned that others has been doing something smiliar as this as well.I kinda felt guilty to feel happy to know im not the only one.

During more into my 8th grade year, its starting to be noticeable on how i changed or how i would wear my bracelets or long sleeves more often or everyday.I still can see the scars and healing cuts.Of course i would not do it that deep considering self control is easy for me.Though there are times where i feel i need it, and im trying to resort to try something else then using that method.So far no progress.I dont think i have depression but i guess i do?

I always think negtively, i had a bad past,i dont know who i am

During the middle of the school year 2 of my closest friends and i got into a fight.Only causing more drama and trouble for me,resulting into not helping me at all.
Even now today im still doubt i belong into the group i friends who are closest to me . :{

[tiki]

I find that the fear to self harm gets lower and lower as I get older, which is scary in itself. I think as I get older I start to care less and less about what people think of me and if they see that I have issues such as self harming. Back in middle school it was all about hiding your scars or whatever and now that I'm about to graduate from college I don't care who sees them and I don't care who talks about them, and I have no issues wearing short sleeves or whatever anymore. I feel like self harm is actually something that everyone deals with, but it differs from person to person on how they inflict their pain.

[Muruki]

I decided to carve weak and strong into my legs, one on each leg. I did weak but I can't bring myself to carve strong. Im not letting myself cut at all unless its carving strong into my leg. I've held out for a few days now I'm pretty proud of myself.

[ImNotOkay]

I did not know do much people did this ...

[Muruki]

I did not know do much people did this ...

Lots of the posts are me trying to keep this thread running. :/

Do you self harm?

[ImNotOkay]

I did not know do much people did this ...

Lots of the posts are me trying to keep this thread running. :/

Do you self harm?

Yes and I still do now

[silentbookgirl]

I shelf harm, I have ...hic... forr yearrsh, shiince I wassh ...hic... about 10. I don't know why I do it anymore.

[Muruki]

I did not know do much people did this ...

Lots of the posts are me trying to keep this thread running. :/

Do you self harm?

Yes and I still do now

I'm sorry.

Came here to talk but I needed to reply too and one post at a time so...

Ive got big ugly scars on my shoulder. Well. That's what my ex said. I think they're beautiful.

[MunchyRawr]

I had an ex that was abusive in several different ways. I was with him for a total of about three years. I didn't even necessarily want to be with him that whole time, but with him threatening to vandalize my mother's house, and then later trying to kill me, I had no choice.

Of all the things he did to me, breaking down my self-esteem and changing my entire mentality about things were the worst. I started smoking cigarettes (even though I have asthma) because of stress from something significant that he did. When I started I was 16 and smoking a pack a day. I wanted to drown myself (I was with family in Florida at the time, there was a pool). I don't smoke anymore because my current (amazing) boyfriend has very strong chronic asthma.

I never had the guts to actually leave scars or anything, but I used to scratch at my eyelids and face A LOT. And my hands too. The fact that I didn't have the guts to inflict a deep wound made me even more depressed.

I don't self-harm anymore, but I occasionally think about it. I'm fairly convinced that I'd be clinically depressed if I just went to be diagnosed, but I unfortunately have had bad experience with counselors and so I will not speak with one unless I feel it is absolutely necessary.