MagiStream

Over the past few months, I’ve learned that only one thing is true. I’m not sure of anything anymore.

I stared out into the forest in front me. Little piles of snow were still fading away; a fading reminder of just how cold the winter had been inside and out. A cool spring breeze ruffled through my fur as the sound of distant voices reminded me of where I should be focusing. I didn’t think I could do it. I couldn’t turn around and look at the broken body that lay behind me.

“Ghost?” I heard a voice whisper. It was so faint I’m surprised I could even hear it. The voice was rough and weak; damaged. Yet, I could still tell who it belonged to. He must have regained consciousness. Slowly, cautiously, I turned around.

“Yes?” I couldn’t raise my voice anymore. There was a lump stuck in the back of my throat as soon as he came into my vision. I swallowed hard and tried to focus on those green eyes, but instead, my eyes wandered to the unrecognizable body.

Fur that I’ve known to be white is hardly that color at all. It’s matted and ruffled with dirt and dried blood. The fur is patchy from painful-looking burn marks that I know will leave scars. A huge scar jutted across the chest of the body. Reeku. I winced, my eyes filling with tears. I tried desperately to hold them back, but I couldn’t. They spilled over anyways and ran down my face like a waterfall. I forced myself to take a step closer.

Reeku opened his mouth like he was going to say something, but nothing came out. I could feel everyone’s eyes on me. I took more steps forward until I was standing right in front of Reeku. Then my legs went weak and I couldn’t stand anymore, so I sat back down.

“You should go to sleep,” I whispered. I didn’t want him to strain himself; he already looked like he was in so much pain. Plus, if Reeku went to sleep, I could get out of here. I wished I could get the image of the broken body out of my head.

I looked away from the bleeding Kitsune and tried to picture the time I’d seen him before this. The one who’d screamed at me to run. His green eyes guarded, but bright with a light that captured me. The time he’d confessed to me that he’d used to be a Dark One out under the stars.

The first time I’d seen Reeku. I’d been flabbergasted and I’d hated his guts. I’d been scared, afraid, and exhausted. I also remembered how when I first saw him his green eyes had captivated me. They still did.

When I looked back at Reeku, his eyes were closed. He’d fallen asleep in the middle of the clearing. It was obviously exhausting for him to even make it back to the clearing from Dark One territory. I was sure he was going to collapse. The whole way there, I’d tried to keep my eyes off him. I couldn’t look at him.

I wished my last memory of him wouldn’t be like this. I wanted to remember Reeku for the strong, brave Kitsune that he was; and not a broken and bleeding one who’d undergone weeks of torture. I’d send him his goodbye in his dreams tonight.

After I grew a third tail, yes I have three now, Oak helped me learn to use illusions. They’re not very good, but I’ve been working on it. I guess that’s about to stop now too since I’ll be gone. I just hope he gets the message and doesn’t wake up afterwards.

I sighed as a breeze ruffled my fur and tried to relax. Was I really going to do this? The answer was yes, yes I was. I couldn’t take the nightmares anymore. Or the sleepless nights. Or the vigorous training and the worries. It was just becoming too much for me to handle. I never signed up for this life.

I’m pretty sure the spirits made the wrong choice when they chose me for this prophecy. I’m weak and shy, and now I’m damaged and fearful too. Without a word to anyone else, I turned and made my way into my den. Stray tears leaked from my eyes now, splashing onto my paws like raindrops. I shook them away and took some deep breaths.

I curled up like I was sleeping, and tried to conjure the image I wanted. I focused deeply on Reeku’s mind, hoping he would receive the message I wanted him to get. Soon enough, I was pulled into an illusion of my own creation.

I sat near the base of a tree. To many it would be an average tree, but it was more to me. This was the place where Reeku and I had first met.

“Ghost?” Reeku asked, slightly confused, as he stepped in front of me. I wondered if he knew this was an illusion, but it didn’t really make a difference. I felt a smile stretch across my face as I took in the image of Reeku I wanted to remember forever. The sleek, creamy white fur and brilliant green eyes.

“Hi, Reeku,” I held my voice together, but I’m sure my eyes showed my discomfort. This was it; I couldn’t back out now. Reeku took a step closer to me.

“Is something wrong?” he asked obviously puzzled. I nodded slowly, swallowing hard as I desperately searched for the right way to say this. I guess I should’ve thought this through a bit more. “What is it?” Reeku pressed.

“I-I’m leaving,” I choked out. There, better to say it how it is than sugar coat it. I didn’t dare look up at Reeku. “I came to say goodbye.”

“What?” Reeku wailed, even more confused. “Leaving? What do you mean you’re leaving?” I could see panic swimming in his eyes as realization began to sink in. “No, no… You can’t mean, you don’t mean you’re…,” Reeku was stumbling all over his words.

“I’m leaving The Auras, Reeku,” I said flatly, feeling tears well up in my eyes at the thought of goodbye. Reeku’s eyes matched my own, only tears dripped freely from his.

“Please don’t! Why would you do this?” Reeku pleaded his voice full of pure desperation.

“Don’t make this harder than it is,” I gulped. “I have to go. I can’t take it anymore. I’m sorry Reeku, but the spirits are wrong. I’m not the Kitsune you’re looking for.”

“No,” Reeku choked out. It seemed like he was unable to formulate any more words.

“By the time you wake up, I will be gone,” I assured him, wishing I could go comfort him. My heart ached inside my chest and teardrops poured down. This wasn’t supposed to be happening! I longed to go over to Reeku and promise I wouldn’t leave. I wanted to assure him I’d be there when he woke up tomorrow… but I couldn’t lie.

“Ghost, don’t do this! I-“Reeku’s last sentence was cut off as my illusion faded away. I wondered what Reeku was going to say, but it wasn’t important anymore. The image of his desperate eyes burned in my mind and I ached to go to him. I didn’t.

Instead, I got shakily to my paws, careful I didn’t hit my head on the top of my den like I did so often. When I walked out into the clearing, I saw Reeku still slept in the center of the clearing. He shivered, but the others had brought some leaves to keep him warm. No one wanted to risk moving him.

Reeku was shifting in his sleep. The sight of him made tears burn in my eyes and sobs rise in the back of my throat, and it took all of my concentration to swallow them down as I walked towards the entrance of the clearing.

“You okay, Ghost?” Shade asked in a whisper, not wanting to disturb anyone. He was on guard tonight. In response, I simply nodded. My voice was lost somewhere in the back of my throat along with the rising hysteria. “Going for walk?” I nodded again. Shade knew as well as everyone that I liked to walk at night when a nightmare troubled me. The difference was, this time, I would not be coming back.

When I stepped past Shade, I looked back to take my last glimpse of the place I’d called home. The Kitsune I’d called family. Shade right in front of me, Reeku crumpled in the clearing. He was restless in his sleep; he knew. Rose, who was pregnant with Shade’s pups… pups I would never see. She was curled up tight in her den, unaware of my escapades. Oh, Oak. How I had betrayed my leaders trust, how I was trading away all the belief he’d put in me. It was too late for second chances. This was my choice.

It took everything I had; my I slowly tore my tear-filling eyes away from the clearing and to the chilly forest in front of me. My home now. I had chosen to return to the life of solitude and control my own fate. It would be lonely, but I could live without pain. I had given in to my fears, they were overwhelming me. As a result, I was leaving my family.

I took that first step forward and it was as if someone had bitten my heart out. Once I’d taken so many steps that Shade couldn’t see me, I let the teardrops do. The sobs choked out frantically and I couldn’t see through the wall of tears, but I walked on. I didn’t stop at all that night. I just fought against the urge to go back home. No, back to The Auras, not home.

I was just nearing the edge of the territory when the sunrise began. I stopped to watch it, blinking away the tears. I had time to watch this one last memory of my old life. A way of saying goodbye, I suppose.

The sun was like liquid gold when it rose into the sky. It illuminated over the landscape, kissing it with its pure lips. Soon enough, I gave up on watching because the tears were falling too fast. I turned towards the direction of unclaimed territory and pushed myself into a run.

The tears ran back from my eyes as I pushed myself to go faster and faster. I concentrated on the thudding of my paws on the ground, desperately trying to ignore the sorrow that welled within me. It would fade with time. I knew. It had when I’d lost my mother, and soon enough this pain would be no more than a memory. A whisper of what once was, but was no more.

Eventually, when I thought I had reached a safe enough distance, I crawled under a bush. The tear drops feel onto my tails, which were curled up over my nose. I closed my eyes and tried to relax, focusing on my breathing. I was exhausted, and soon enough the blackness of sleep swept over me.

I dreamt of The Auras back home.

Chapter One
Chapter Two