Congrats on that. It's very hard to stop.NeriaLeander wrote:Okay, here we go...
I've self harmed for as long as I can remember. In the fifth grade I gave myself a black eye. In kindergarten I scratched myself until I bled. I started cutting in seventh grade; I started burning in eighth. I'm a junior in highschool now (11th grade), and I've been clean for a few weeks. For the first time, I'm making an effort to not fall back into my bad habits.
I was diagnosed with depression and anxiety about two years ago.
I never cut for attention. Ever. I always hope that no one finds out. Sometimes they don't, sometimes they do. I've had to get 3 psychiatric evaluations at hospitals after being caught. A little over a year ago, they kept me in a psych ward for 11 days. It was life changing; I'm still in touch with the other girls who were locked in that hellhole with me. I got locked up for a suicide attempt. It was my seventh failed attempt in three years.
Cutting has always been a coping mechanism for me. I'd get it in my head that I needed to do it, and would become so desperate that I'd use anything; sewing needles, broken plastic, broken glass, kitchen knives, shaving razors, scissors. I'd use nail clippers on my wrists, I'd take razors out of pencil sharpeners; I was a mess. If there was nothing that I could use, I'd use my teeth and nails.
I'd post pictures of my cuts online and then read all of the terrible things people would say about me: "Cut deeper", "You should just drink bleach","Kill yourself". And then I'd cut some more.
I counted all my scars today. All 157 of them.
I'm so glad that I won't make anymore.
Quitting was hard. It's one of the hardest things I've ever had to do. But now, when I want to self-harm (this is so cliche smh) I'd just ask myself what Tyler Joseph would think, and I know he would be upset if anyone was self-harming. So I've stayed clean. For him. One day it will be for me, but right now it's for him.
Find your idol, someone you'd hate to make upset. Think about them when you want to self-injure, and hopefully you will find the strength to stop. I believe in all of you. If you need someone to talk to, please pm me, and hopefully I'll see it in time to help you. I know how hard it is, but you are stronger than you know. It's not your fault.
Self-Injury
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- MoonandDew
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Re: Self-Injury
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- MoonandDew
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Re: Self-Injury
I used to self-harm, it wasn't fun. I stopped, but a couple weeks ago I relapsed. Then I stopped again, but its really hard. I still keep my razors in my room in case I need the.
To everyone who used to self harm, congrats on stopping. For everyone who does self harm, I'm always here if you need to talk.
To everyone who used to self harm, congrats on stopping. For everyone who does self harm, I'm always here if you need to talk.
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- MoonandDew
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Re: Self-Injury
I'm 2 days clean, as of now. Yay!!!!
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- MagiStream Donor
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Re: Self-Injury
I don't know you at all but i'm proud. have a cutting problem and I'm trying to quit but it's SO HARD!MoonandDew wrote:I'm 2 days clean, as of now. Yay!!!!
If your ever having any bad feelings and don't know where to go, feel free to PM me and I will try my very best to help you. The same to ANYBODY here. Feel free
- MoonandDew
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Re: Self-Injury
^^ Same goes for me. I have just relapsed, but I'm trying to stop. If anyone needs to talk, I'm here.Rinnyracecar wrote:I don't know you at all but i'm proud. have a cutting problem and I'm trying to quit but it's SO HARD!MoonandDew wrote:I'm 2 days clean, as of now. Yay!!!!
If your ever having any bad feelings and don't know where to go, feel free to PM me and I will try my very best to help you. The same to ANYBODY here. Feel free
I LOVE cats!! Feel free to send me unwanted cats for my cat army!!
I want more Ice Kitsunes!! Always!!
I want more Ice Kitsunes!! Always!!
- TheEmbodimentOfKarma
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Re: Self-Injury
If I chew myself as a habit (and because I'm usually constantly chewing something in general, whether it be my pen, eraser, fingernails, or whatever I have), is it still self harm?
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- MagiStream Donor
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Re: Self-Injury
Technically self harm is when you draw blood, but I believe that if it hurts you blood or not, than yes it is. Also, is the chewing from a mental disorder or just because?TheEmbodimentOfKarma wrote:If I chew myself as a habit (and because I'm usually constantly chewing something in general, whether it be my pen, eraser, fingernails, or whatever I have), is it still self harm?
- TheEmbodimentOfKarma
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Re: Self-Injury
I have mild high-functioning autistic spectrum disorder. I tend to act like a cat sometimes. I don't chew on myself to harm myself, just to chew on something. I also taste salty, and I like salt :3Rinnyracecar wrote:Technically self harm is when you draw blood, but I believe that if it hurts you blood or not, than yes it is. Also, is the chewing from a mental disorder or just because?TheEmbodimentOfKarma wrote:If I chew myself as a habit (and because I'm usually constantly chewing something in general, whether it be my pen, eraser, fingernails, or whatever I have), is it still self harm?
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- Intempestivity
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Re: Self-Injury
There are a lot of forms of self harm that don't draw blood (burning, breaking bones, bruising). They are all valid and recognised forms of self harm, and just because someone hasn't drawn blood doesn't mean they haven't hurt themselves. I'd say the main diagnostic criteria for self harm is intent. If you are damaging yourself purposefully and with intent to cause injury, that is self harm.Rinnyracecar wrote:Technically self harm is when you draw blood, but I believe that if it hurts you blood or not, than yes it is. Also, is the chewing from a mental disorder or just because?TheEmbodimentOfKarma wrote:If I chew myself as a habit (and because I'm usually constantly chewing something in general, whether it be my pen, eraser, fingernails, or whatever I have), is it still self harm?
If you chew on your skin as a nervous habit, but you are not intending to cause injury to yourself, I would say that does not classify as self harm. Same for people to tend to scratch themselves as nervous habit, and even trich sufferers--injury happens to be a side-effect of the action, not the purpose.
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I have written about my experiences earlier in this thread. In that post, I liked to a great website that offers different alternative coping methods depending on how you are feeling and how you usually harm, and I'll link it again below.
https://www.healthyplace.com/abuse/self ... lf-injury/
- Citrisoda
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Re: Self-Injury
This might sound weird but I'm so glad this topic exists. It means I can just ramble into the void without having to worry about it too much. Talking about it to someone in real life is scary.
Even though I've been trying to keep myself away from self-harm, I still occasionally do it. The most usual way being hitting myself with a blunt object, although blood has happened many times in the past, be it by scissors or a stapled ruler. It's unfortunate to have scars on my legs during the summertime.
I feel like I might feel guilty about oversharing soon but we'll see.
Even though I've been trying to keep myself away from self-harm, I still occasionally do it. The most usual way being hitting myself with a blunt object, although blood has happened many times in the past, be it by scissors or a stapled ruler. It's unfortunate to have scars on my legs during the summertime.
I feel like I might feel guilty about oversharing soon but we'll see.