The "It may be common sense for some, but..." thread

[Raneth]

So, many times in my life I've encountered something where everyone seems to know how to do it, but I don't. Things that are considered common sense by any adult (or mature child/teen) that require an initial acquisition of knowledge.

It started in 4th grade when a friend yelled at me because I didn't know how to address a letter-my parents never taught me, and our school didn't have home ec. Other things I've seen others not know how to do are sign checks, balance checkbooks, download software, etc.

Not knowing how to do something like that doesn't mean you're dumb-it just means you were never taught. So I figured this would be a good thread for people to ask for help on those little things that they don't know how to do, or need advice doing, or even encouragement on (considering talking on the phone is scary for some people).

It can also be a place to ask for others' opinions on things-like if some social interaction went awry, and you need help with it, just ask for it here.

[askalka]

Okay, so this may sound very strange, but I can't lace up shoes. No matter how hard I try, I just cannot learn that. That's why I don't wear shoes with laces.

It's not because I don't know how to. I just seem to be unable to do that.

[TxCat]

Okay, so this may sound very strange, but I can't lace up shoes. No matter how hard I try, I just cannot learn that. That's why I don't wear shoes with laces.

It's not because I don't know how to. I just seem to be unable to do that.

You're not alone there. Not only can I not lace them properly but I cannot tie them right either. I'm left handed and everyone in my family was right handed. They couldn't show me and the teachers couldn't show me so I have spent most of my life wearing shoes that did not need tied (they either had these little button hook things or they had velcro). Now, I wear Crocs because they just slip on and off and no one needs to tie them.

Another failing: I can't fold sheets to save my life, especially not that bottom sheet with the elastic corners.

[HobbitFeet]

For as well off as I am in language arts, I cannot, for the life of me, spell "thoroughly" without looking it up. I don't know why. It's not a difficult word, it's not like I haven't used it and read it some 100+ times, but it never sticks. There's a hole in my brain where that word falls through.

[KitsuneBeauty]

This may not be strange, but it's still something that bothers me. I do not get math. At all. Even things that are considered easy by most people. No matter how many times it's explained to me, and every other way it's explained, I just can't understand it. My mind doesn't seem to be wired to. I'll look at a problem, and instantly my mind gets tangled and confused trying to understand everything that needs to be done to solve it.
What's worse is neither of my parents get it either, yet my dad still enjoys griping and yelling at me about how if I "just pay attention" I'll understand it.

[Ktanaqui]

I can't fold that elastic banded sheet to save my life either, Tx. It just defeats me every time. So do those darned graphs in Algebra... I just, I can't get it. I've had people explain them to me hundreds of times but it never sticks.

My memory is another failing. I can't remember little details about people to save my life. My boyfriend thinks it should be easy; I should be able to remember that he has these little irks - like tons of questions. But it never sticks. Ben says that it is common sense to remember that a person can see certain faults in people, but they don't work with me. It results in quite a few arguments

[Raneth]

I still can't tie my shoes the proper way either. I tie them "the bunny way"-tie the laces in a knot, then then fold each side into loops and tie the loops in a knot (like folding a rabbit's ears into a knot). But the "rabbit going around the tree and through the hole thing?" Can't do it consistently. I can do it when someone else shows me, but then it kind of...falls out of my head, and I go back to the bunny way.

Also, I hate mailing packages. Do I put all the stuff in the package and wrap it up before taking it to the post office first? Or do I go there and assemble it there, where they actually have packing tape? Where on the box do I write the address? There's too many things to worry about.

[TxCat]

Also, I hate mailing packages. Do I put all the stuff in the package and wrap it up before taking it to the post office first? Or do I go there and assemble it there, where they actually have packing tape? Where on the box do I write the address? There's too many things to worry about.

The post office causes me considerable anxiety since I don't go out much anyhow. I have found, however, that the easiest way to handle a post office trip where packages are involved is to make a list of what needs done and do most of it at home first. This is mine:

Have on hand:

- wrapping paper
- assorted size boxes
- regular gift tape
- packing tape
- brown paper wrapping
- address labels

Wrap the package as you would normally. Then find a box in which to put it. Old newspapers make good cushioning or, if you're sending stuff like clothing, you can wrap the more fragile things in the clothing. I put an inventory of the things I'm sending up top with a warning that there are other things wrapped in the clothes so that the recipient doesn't break something. If the box has print on it, you can wrap THAT in brown paper (bought at Wal-Mart, most Wal-Marts have an excellent mailing supply center now). Address to them goes in the center of the package. Your address (I have mailing labels so I don't have to keep printing it out) goes in the top left corner. I use a clear, non smearing black or dark blue ink so the postal service can clearly read the label.

Once done, I take the package to the desk and have them weigh it so I know exactly how much to pay. Generally they'll place another stamping label on the box to confirm the postage was paid. When possible, take the extra time to insure breakable items and to obtain a tracking number. It will ease your mind considerably regarding whether or not the package gets to its destination (that also, of course, depends on the value of the stuff inside).

If you have to assemble your package at the postal service, DON'T do it in line. Pick out the things you need from the displays, take it to a counter they have for that purpose, and do it there. Same procedure applies. Once you've finished, get in line and pay for shipping the package.

On the folding bottom sheet question, I found this:

How to Fold a Fitted Sheet

It actually works. Do it a few times and you'll have it committed to memory.

[crazyflight]

Raneth, I share the bunny tying shoes situation... It never works for me, the other way. I once tied a Pre-K kid's shoelace, and she said "That's not how Mommy does it!" I couldn't help but feel that I spazzed out. It was so innocent, but true.

I also can NEVER spell certain words at certain times. Like broccoli and embarrassed... With those double-consonants... It kills me!

[Eirene]

Tx, you share a trait in common with my daughter. She is also left handed, and my entire side of the family is right handed. My mother insists on buying her tie up shoes, and Bre just HATES them. She prefers flip flops or slip on shoes. Her favorite pair of shoes she wore every day until they fell apart on her feet. I got her another pair, and despite a huge hole over her big toe, she refuses to wear anything else unless it's flip flops. And her feet are HUGE for her age. 10 years old, almost 5 foot tall, and wears a size 7 shoe right now (she went from a 4 at the beginning of the school year to a 7 at the end).

Fitted sheets I hate, so I tend to fold them as best as I can. I don't worry too much about them. I turn them inside out before folding, so when I'm done folding, they're right side out. But I can never get them folded the way the manufacturing companies do, so instead of a 2 inch high folded sheet, I tend to have 4 or 6 inch high folded sheets.