MagiStream

ArcticStar wrote: I've become so self-conscious about this that over the years I've developed a deep fear of public speaking, just because I'm subconsciously afraid of what people will think of my slight accent.

Take some solace in the fact that you are in the majority here and a deep fear of public speaking is completely normal. Public speaking is probably the most stressful things in a person's life. In fact comedian Jerry Seinfield jokes that some people would rather die than speak in public (rather be the one in the coffin instead of giving the eulogy.) Here is a quote from a pretty good book to read about it: The Attack of the Butterflies - Confessions of a Public Speaker by Scott Berkun found at this site.

• Mark Twain, who made most of his income from speaking, not writing, said, "There are two types of speakers: those that are nervous and those that are liars."
• Elvis Presley said, "I've never gotten over what they call stage fright. I go through it every show."
• Thomas Jefferson was so afraid of public speaking he had someone else read the State of the Union address (George Washington didn't like speaking either).
• Bono, of U2, claims to get nervous the morning of every one of the thousands of shows he's performed.
• Winston Churchill, JFK, Margaret Thatcher, Barbara Walters, Johnny Carson, Barbara Streisand, and Ian Holm have all reported fears of public communication.
• Aristotle, Isaac Newton, Charles Darwin, Winston Churchill, John Updike, Jack Welch, and James Earl Jones all had stutters and were nervous speakers at one time in their lives.

ArcticStar wrote:One stereotype that I don't really mind is _____ This used to bother me very much, until I realized that _____.

If you just fill in the blanks each time, you are not letting any feelings about a stereotype control you. The eating strange animals doesn't control you anymore. If only more people were able to do this and just get over it instead of feeling such outrage things would be a lot better.

ArcticStar wrote:My good friend and I do this all the time just for laughs.

The only problem that can happen tho is if someone outside your group gets involved. If someone you don't know hears you making racial statements they could possibly be offended, or think that you are ok with that and make statements of their own to "break the ice" that might offend you or others. It could be said that you are allowing stereotyping to continue by this behavior - (though I don't have a problem with this - I don't think stereotypes are a bad thing) - but some people might also be upset with the principal of it.

if you refer to yourself as American, refer to me as American as well. It's also really bothering when someone asks me what part of Asia I was born in.

The term African-American really irks me. Just what part of Africa was this now? A guy I used to work with is married to a Black. She prefers the term Black because her family is French. To her being called African-American is an insult. Interesting huh?
Here's a quote from Former President Theodore Roosevelt:

There is no room in this country for hyphenated Americanism. When I refer to hyphenated Americans, I do not refer to naturalized Americans. Some of the very best Americans I have ever known were naturalized Americans, Americans born abroad. But a hyphenated American is not an American at all... The one absolutely certain way of bringing this nation to ruin, of preventing all possibility of its continuing to be a nation at all, would be to permit it to become a tangle of squabbling nationalities, an intricate knot of German-Americans, Irish-Americans, English-Americans, French-Americans, Scandinavian-Americans or Italian-Americans, each preserving its separate nationality, each at heart feeling more sympathy with Europeans of that nationality, than with the other citizens of the American Republic... There is no such thing as a hyphenated American who is a good American. The only man who is a good American is the man who is an American and nothing else.

ArcticStar wrote:

Eclaire wrote: -Asians are short. Why yes, most Asians are short. Just because Yao Ming breaks the mold (both literally and figuratively) doesn't make the stereotype any less valid. He is just an exception. There is always an exception and you can't overturn a general consensus based on a few exceptions.

This stereotype doesn't really bother me, but don't tell me that you've never seen a short Caucasian or non-Asian before. In fact, most of the Asians I've met are around the same height, or taller than other races, and most of the shorter than average people I've met are Caucasian. I do realize that you said "most", but that depends on what you compare them to. Like I said earlier, people tend not to realize that stereotypes often fit many groups of people, not just that one; therefore, most stereotypes are invalid and quite hypocritical.

I have seen short non-asians. I'm half asian. At 5'4" I'm one of the taller people in Asia (I've spent considerable time in Japan, Thailand, Korea, and the Philippines) and am one of the shorter people in America (Being in the military I was exposed to quite the array of people from all walks of life.) To Asians I look white, and to non-Asians I look Asian so I don't really ever get to "fit in" anywhere. There is a lot of truth to stereotypes - that's why they exist.

Stereotypes also heavily depend on the majority of the people in that area. In America, you'll rarely find a stereotype against Caucasians, but stereotypes about other races are everywhere.

Many stereotypes are also based on comparison. If, for example, I said, "Asians are smart compared to Caucasians", I wouldn't get too many complaints, as it is seemingly "well-known" that this is "true". However, if I said the reverse example, "Caucasians are stupid compared to Asians", I'd immediately get shot down.

Those are more insults rather than just being a stereotype-only because of the way they are being used.

Eclaire wrote:Stereotypes are a popular belief about a grouping of people.

Many people confuse stereotypes with prejudice. A lot of that has already happened in this thread.

I challenge anyone that thinks stereotypes are wrong to go to the gang-ridden side of their town at 2am and get to know the gang bangers. Wear expensive clothing and nice jewelry and let them know that they shouldn't rob you because that's a stereotype and that's just plain wrong. Don't forget to talk to the guy halfway passed out on the bench drinking from a paper bag with white powder stuck to his nose and get to know what a wonderful guy this is. Let me know how this works out for you.

There are stereotypes for a reason. It's a popular belief because there is a truth to it.
-Asians are short. Why yes, most Asians are short. Just because Yao Ming breaks the mold (both literally and figuratively) doesn't make the stereotype any less valid. He is just an exception. There is always an exception and you can't overturn a general consensus based on a few exceptions.

Do you mean "wrong" by factually incorrect or morally incorrect? I don't understand your argument. No one's telling other people to stop acting a certain way because it's stereotypical of them to act that way. If you explain that a bit more, I'll probably think of a more adequate reply.

I really don't think your argument about the passed-out druggie is valid, either. I used to have an image in my mind that had been drilled into me from an early age--drugs are bad, drugs ain't cool, don't do drugs because you're going to mess up your entire life, stay away from other people who do drugs. Ah, the beauty of public school education. It is, unfortunately, a stereotype that our very own schools have planted within our minds.

But now that I'm older, I've stopped and taken a look around myself. I know people who do drugs, who drink, who smoke. When I was younger I would have been shocked, horrified, and would have done my best to stay away from "people like that." But you know what? These people are all normal people. They're funny, they're unique, and they're generally pretty laid-back. They're not bad people. My initial judgments of them were completely wrong.

We don't know the story behind that passed-out drunk. Does this happen often? Was it the first time? Who knows what may have really happened? Sure, we can make inferences, but I refuse to think that he's a bad person because I've seen him in this state just once.

As for the validity of stereotypes--I agree that there is some basis of truth in them. You mention Yao Ming, how he's a tall Asian and how he defies the stereotype. You also said that there are always exceptions. And that's where I'll draw my next argument from. Exactly, there are always, always exceptions. And those exceptions make it impossible for a stereotype to define a group of people. Just because a group is mostly something does not justify defining every element of that group as one. It's such a narrow, inflexible point of view. It's totally disregarding every exception, which is actually a bigger deal than many people many think.

Everyone is an exception to some rule, in some shape or form. I personally don't want to be lumped in with the numerous Asian stereotypes that don't even apply to me. Those who make assumptions about me simply because I am Asian are probably further off the mark than they realize. I don't believe that you can judge person based on whatever stereotype of them you have in your mind.

Well this basically sums up my life.

Not-So-Tragic back story anyone?

(Not meaning to spam or anything.)

Here awesome stereotypes that apply to me.

I like Star Trek-
According to stereotype, because I like star trek, I should be a man who doesn't have a job, wears flannel, lives in his parents basement, is unemployed, and is as pale as a ghost because he never goes outside.
That is obviously not me.

I write-
According to stereotype, because I write I but am under 18, my writing is horrible, and I am never gong to succeed in life. Apparently what's going to happen to me is I'm going to rely on it becoming a hit and end up working in a fast-food restaurant and complain about misunderstood artists until I commit suicide. Not true.

I am a girl who likes science-
That means, according to pop culture that I'm a short little nerd who wears glasses, has no social life, is unpopular and picked on. Okay...Kind of true.

I am a girl-
I am, according to stereotype, obsessed with fashion and boys, afraid of being dirty, I hate school, and want to be famous for my singing. The only thing I ever read if fashion magazines and romance novels.
Can you picture anyone LESS like me?

Some stereotypes bother me a good amount, such as me being in an extra math class (That I chose to attend to help my skills) qualifies me as stupid. People at my school always think that even though a lot of the popular crowd dwells there.

The only stereotype I don't care about is me being a general nerd/band nerd. It's true, and I take that as a complement.

I think some stereotypes are okay - as long as they aren't hurting someone. For example, I'm from Switzerland, and we're said to be very slow. And I am really slow, so when I'm abroad I just use that stereotype as a joke to explain my slowness. I don't mind, if someone uses this stereotype to describe me or likewise. Though other people I now could be offended by it.

I can relate to that kind of thing.

I love anime, so they think I'm a geek or nerd, and someone who lacks social skills and is basically useless to the society whatsoever.

I have high math grades, so they think I study every night, know all the answers to the test, and get perfect marks every time.

I'm friends with the valedictorian, so they think I'm a goody-two-shoes too [same stereotype as the Valedictorian], a smartass, a killjoy, and all those things they think of when top students are mentioned.

Strange thing is, I can handle myself well in a crowd, I have a lot of friends, I don't get perfect every time, and I SO DO NOT study every night. So where did all these stereotypical descriptions come from?? O.O

People often stereotype me as 'emo' or 'goth'. I prefer to think of it as 'gomo' if I have to be stereotyped. But seriously, being stereotyped as emo in the past has made me go emo previously, to the state of self-harm and almost suicide (I know that not all emos are like this. If I assumed they were I would be stereotyping like a hypocrite) and therefore I do believe that stereotyping is an important issue. Just because someone (like me) enjoys listening to My Chemical Romance and other bands like them, and music that is actually original 'goth' music, doesn't make them gomo. It just means they have their own taste in music. Another thing I've faced in this matter before is the fact that my hair colour is blonde. Although I do think dumb blonde jokes are hillarious and easy to pick holes in.

I find it interesting that you brought up 'labels' as a form of stereotypes, because many people tend to think that stereotypes only apply to ethnic groups. As many people before me have said, thinking of people in a sort of 'collective' is often simply a matter of humans needing some way of organizing their thoughts regarding people that are different in some way. The tendency to stereotype people could come from the same reason why we separate people into different countries. Humans group themselves and others, and it is rather impossible for them to think of other groups as collections of completely unique individuals because they focus on what traits are common to most of the population of one group in order to keep track of everything. That was a bit of a rambling sentence, but I hope that you understand what I mean.

That said, I do have a problem with the use of stereotypes when they are used for certain reasons. If someone says that everyone who likes history (as I do) is boring because that's what they actually think, then I have a problem because they are just being ignorant. If you're going to insult someone, at least have your insult founded in solid fact. Second, when people use stereotypes that they know are false to hurt people. Honestly, whenever I hear people joking about ANY distinct group just for the sake of being jerks... I lose a bit of faith in humanity. However, if someone knows that the stereotype that they are bringing up does not apply to everyone, and they make it VERY clear that their intent is solely to create humor... I am fine with it. As long as I can tell that the intent is kind, but teasing, instead of ignorant or cruel, I think that stereotypes are alright.