MagiStream

We've all heard of the stories of the many teenagers committing suicide due to constant harassment and bullying.

• What do you think causes children to act this way?
• Why do you think teens and children feel better by ridiculing others?
• If you are a child/teen have you ever went to a discipline teacher at your school and tell them your problem but they haven't done anything about it?
• If you are an adult and have children have they had similar problems of teachers not doing anything about there bullying case?
• If you are an adult without children are you bullied at your workplace or college?
• What are some ideas you may have to decrease the number of suicides/ help the bullying problem? Have you ever witnessed someone being bullied and stood there and just watched?
• Have you witnessed someone being bullied and helped them?
• As a child have you ever been scared to go to school because of bullies?
• Do you know anyone who may have committed suicide due to bullying?
• Were you a bully?
• How did you deal with bullying?

For some people this may be sensitive material, just a warning.

* What do you think causes children to act this way?
A lot of the time, from what I can see, young children (elementary age) can't see the difference between playful bantering and bullying. They see older kids/adults/their parents doing that bantering (which sometimes isn't playful...) and think that is an acceptable form of communication. Some of my students often will call each other names and then say "I didn't mean it to be mean..." when the other party gets their feelings hurt.
* Why do you think teens and children feel better by ridiculing others?
Well... some are just highly insecure. They are so insecure about certain aspects of their lives, be it physical or mental aspects, that they feel it necessary to put others down to "boost" their own lives up.
* If you are a child/teen have you ever went to a discipline teacher at your school and tell them your problem but they haven't done anything about it?
I'm not a child/teen anymore, but I know I never went and told anyone when I was bullied in elementary school.
* If you are an adult and have children have they had similar problems of teachers not doing anything about there bullying case?
As an adult (and teacher consequently) I haven't had this problem. Any situation that arises in my room is dealt with accordingly and trust me, even though I'm in Kindergarten.. I have had to diffuse quite a few bullying situations.
* If you are an adult without children are you bullied at your workplace or college?
Nope.
* What are some ideas you may have to decrease the number of suicides/ help the bullying problem? Have you ever witnessed someone being bullied and stood there and just watched?
In my school, we do anti-bullying programs that teach the kids what bullying really is, how to spot it, how to intervene if a friend is being bullied, and how to tell the difference between reporting (for bullying) and tattling.. which is a huuuuge issue with young kids.
Gods no. As a bullying victim, that would make me feel even worse to let someone be bullied and not stop it.
* Have you witnessed someone being bullied and helped them?
Actually no, but if I did I would help.
* As a child have you ever been scared to go to school because of bullies?
I wasn't ever bullied physically, mine was mental bullying (name calling and all that) which didn't make me afraid of school, I just hated it a lot because I knew I'd have a new plethora of names thrown at me that day.
* Do you know anyone who may have committed suicide due to bullying?
I do in fact.. though of course it's just "rumored" he did it due to bullying.. but I think he did.
* Were you a bully?
Nope, though I do admit when I was 3rd grade I did take my frustrations out from being bullied onto "weaker kids" but I quickly realized that didn't make me feel any better.. so I quit.
* How did you deal with bullying?
I just... took it and kept my mouth shut. Not a good way of dealing with it.

[*]What do you think causes children to act this way?
Sin nature is the ultimate cause. Humans tear others down to make themselves feel better. To feel like they fit in or will be admired by others they think approve- when they're bullying someone and others laugh. They don't know a better way to respond to other humans. It seems normal and natural to them. I know I was a victim a few times over my childhood of cases where if the boy likes you, he hits you. ::shakes head::

[*]Why do you think teens and children feel better by ridiculing others?
Not certain that it does- at least, not all the time. See above, I kind of answered both there.

[*]If you are a child/teen have you ever went to a discipline teacher at your school and tell them your problem but they haven't done anything about it?
It's been a long time ago... but I do recall being told "Ignore them and they go away". It NEVER worked that way. They just escalated to continue to get a rise out of me. I got good at stuffing my hurts under the rug.

There was one case, where not only was the bullying not stopped, but somehow I, the victim, ended up having to apologize! One day, in our classroom in 6th grade, the teacher had stepped out, I was getting something out of the coat closet and one of the bullies decided it would be fun to block my path. I got irritated and gave her a push, telling her to get out of my way. Well, the push was just right that she tripped over something behind her, fell to the floor, and her hand landed in the class pet's food container, throwing hamster food everywhere. I said nothing and walked back to my desk. Two of her friends decided that I had done something horrible and that I was going to be punished for it. By the time school ended, they had a good third of the class on their side. As I was walking up the hill to go home, I was surrounded, verbally abused, and then a few of them started to literally kick me in the butt. I chose to NOT fight. I remember only talking to defend what I had done- that she had been in my way and I pushed her, she tripped and fell on her own. I didn't cry. There were tons of cars driving by, and finally ONE pulled over and stopped and the guy got out and sent the bullies running. That was when I started crying. I finished walking home, and told Mom what had happened. She... didn't do anything about it. She comforted me. We figured that would be the end of it.
The next day at school, the three main bullies were called into the principal's office. I had a half hour of "good, they're getting in trouble". I got called to the principal's office, and I didn't think anything of it, he probably wanted to know my side of the story.
I was horrified when he basically dismissed my side, and *I* was made to apologize to *THEM* for pushing the one. (Wow... I didn't realize how angry this still made me, and here it is 20+ years later...)

[*]If you are an adult and have children have they had similar problems of teachers not doing anything about there bullying case?
No, but I do recall an instance of a friend who was being mercilessly bullied (verbally and physically) by a guy in her school, she'd told teachers, she'd told her mom who had called the school and nothing changed. My friend finally had enough, and when he was after her in a hall, she punched him. When he was on the floor, she stepped on his crotch. (Overreaction? Maybe... just a little bit) She got him to promise to leave her alone and she walked away- to a stunned crowd in the hallway. The next day, her mom was called to the school and she to the principal's office. They went over the long list of all the crap he'd done to her, and the principal's response was, "Well, boys will be boys."
Her mom started looking for a new place to live to get them out of that school's area. When they left, they made cookies and brought them to the teacher's lounge. The cookies were full of X-Lax...

[*]If you are an adult without children are you bullied at your workplace or college?
never at work or college, only in Jr. High and below. I had withdrawn so much that it was one of the reasons Mom chose to homeschool me through high school.

[*]What are some ideas you may have to decrease the number of suicides/ help the bullying problem?
I have not dealt with anyone who suicided over bullying. I did have one acquaintance in 8th grade who committed suicide, and I know she was one of the loners- no friends, never talked, remained by herself... I think she had other stuff going on that wasn't bullying that made her feel it was the best solution.

[*] Have you ever witnessed someone being bullied and stood there and just watched?
Not that I can remember...

[*] Have you witnessed someone being bullied and helped them?
Many times. One of the 'most fun' 'rescues' was these freaking 2nd graders were picking on my little kindergarten brother. I was in 6th or 7th grade at the time, and had walked to the school to pick him up. He'd complained about it, but none of the teachers had caught them at it. *I* caught them at it, and I just came up behind them and loomed over them and snarled, "HEY! Just what do you think you're doing to my little brother?" And they turned and their eyes bugged out and they got all pale and ran off. They never bothered him again.
I think as early as 3rd grade, I knew that I was one of the outcasts. And I realized that other outcasts needed friends. I was secure enough in who I was that I was perfectly fine making friends with those other social outcasts. So I started making a conscious effort to do so. In 6th grade, I refused an offer to join the popular crowd, and instead actively sought out to befriend first the main social misfit and then a couple of others.
In Jr. High especially, I found that I really didn't care much when *I* was teased, but you did NOT hurt my friends. I could let anything slide off my own back, but I was all over you if you harassed a friend. Sometimes, all I had to do was push my way through and stand beside them. Sometimes, I ran for a teacher- sometimes I did both.

[*]As a child have you ever been scared to go to school because of bullies?
Never too afraid to, but there were times when I didn't want to go to school because I couldn't stand how cruel people were to each other. This culminated in 8th grade and helped lead my mom to the decision to home school her children.

[*]Do you know anyone who may have committed suicide due to bullying?
Nope, see above.

[*]Were you a bully?
never.

edit: I take that back. Once... 7th grade... I have no idea WHY I did it... but I basically turned on one of my friends and was randomly mean to her.
It is something I still regret to this day, and if I had the chance, I would apologize profusely to her for it.

[*]How did you deal with bullying?[/list]
In addition to what I've said above...
The one time in Jr. High that I was ganged up on and cornered. I said nothing. I stood my ground for a moment, and then slipped along the wall and walked quickly to an area where there were many more people. They dispersed. They didn't know how to handle someone who wasn't cowering or actively fighting back. I know they thought I was going to tell a teacher- I didn't, but I knew that if I was in a place where more kids and potentially teachers were, I was safer.

What do you think causes children to act this way?-To me people who bully has a bad relationship with one of their parents,their parents abuse them,their parents bullies them,or they are victims themselves of being bullied
Why do you think teens and children feel better by ridiculing others?-They like to see others react when they bully them. It makes them feel in control and feel better about what is wrong/going on with them.
If you are a child/teen have you ever went to a discipline teacher at your school and tell them your problem but they haven't done anything about it?-No, Ive been bullied all my life and I just took it. I didnt tell anyone till people started to notice my emotions and actions were changing. I started to become more angry at what people said to me even if it was a joke,I started to cut and drink (im under age..) , and over all just really depressed (and still am..its getting worse..)
If you are an adult and have children have they had similar problems of teachers not doing anything about there bullying case?
If you are an adult without children are you bullied at your workplace or college?
What are some ideas you may have to decrease the number of suicides/ help the bullying problem? Have you ever witnessed someone being bullied and stood there and just watched?-I think that in schools, when a kid tells an adult (teachers or the principal) that that teacher/principal call the parents of each child and tell them whats going on and explain to the parents that their child is a bully and is hurting other. And that bully also be expelled from that school. Everyone knows that even if the principal did that the bully wouldnt stop.
Have you witnessed someone being bullied and helped them?-I have. I wanted to help but I am a socialphobic when confrunting anyone in person.
As a child have you ever been scared to go to school because of bullies?-Yup. Still am. I fake sick just to stay home..
Do you know anyone who may have committed suicide due to bullying?-A friend from middle school. Her ex bf sent nudes of her to the school and she took her fathers hunting rifle and shot herself in the head
Were you a bully?-Yes but I stopped because I noticed it was wrong.
How did you deal with bullying?-Cutting, Drinking, Depressing music,Crying

(I'm a teenager, been bullied before. I'll answer this as maturely as possible.)
What do you think causes children to act this way?
I'm not sure really, sometimes it can be due to personal problems at home or something like that other times it's just down to the fact that the kid is being bullied themselves or they're just an awful person.
Why do you think teens and children feel better by ridiculing others?
I certainly don't anyway but from what I have seen or experienced before some people seem to gain self confidence by bulling others.
If you are a child/teen have you ever went to a discipline teacher at your school and tell them your problem but they haven't done anything about it?
Yes, I know exactly what this feels like. When I was being bullied I told loads of teachers, they said that something would be done to fix the problem. I waited weeks for some teacher to help - I even told the prinicipal... nothing happened to help me.
If you are an adult and have children have they had similar problems of teachers not doing anything about there bullying case?
...
If you are an adult without children are you bullied at your workplace or college?
...
What are some ideas you may have to decrease the number of suicides/ help the bullying problem?
We could have some programme in schools which brings awareness to bullies/being bullies/ what you can do to stop it?
Have you ever witnessed someone being bullied and stood there and just watched?
Yes, I have just watched before but that before I was bullied myself. After experiencing what being bullied is like and I saw someone being bullied - yes I help them straight away. I'm generally a lover not a fighter so I would probably help them verbally ... not by kicking the crap out of the bully. (Unless it was some girly b*tchfight then I couldn't care less. Please excuse my language. :3)
Have you witnessed someone being bullied and helped them?
No, not yet anyway.
As a child have you ever been scared to go to school because of bullies?
Yep.... 2 months of being utterly terrified of school. It got so bad I had to change to different school to actually stop the bulling. (But at least now I love school!)
Do you know anyone who may have committed suicide due to bullying?
No... but I myself got seriously depressed over it.
Were you a bully?
No!!! And I never ever will be one! Not after you see how awful it is to be bullied yourself.
How did you deal with bullying?
Ummm, I moved schools. But that's because the other school was so crap and the teachers couldn't care less if someone was bullied or not. It was a last resort sort of thing.

• What do you think causes children to act this way?
  I don't know. I was into bullying for a bit, I admit it. I did it so people would stop thinking I was weak or a push over. I don't know why other people would do it. I imagine the reasons vary.
• Why do you think teens and children feel better by ridiculing others?
  People let up on me. It was a matter of eat or be eaten at the time, or so I thought.
• If you are a child/teen have you ever went to a discipline teacher at your school and tell them your problem but they haven't done anything about it?
  Kids have targeted me since pre-k. They told me I didn't have good enough parents because they both worked. I didn't have enough money for their liking, my house wasn't big enough, I didn't have the cool toys for show and tell. I came home crying one day, my parents told the teachers, the teacher did nothing. Nobody did anything. I was young, I took it to heart.
• What are some ideas you may have to decrease the number of suicides/ help the bullying problem? Have you ever witnessed someone being bullied and stood there and just watched?
  You never know a person until you hear their story. Educate kids, tell them there is more than themselves in the world.
  And plenty of times I sat and watched. I was happy when it wasn't me.
• Have you witnessed someone being bullied and helped them?
  Well, no. I walked away but I never steped up.
• As a child have you ever been scared to go to school because of bullies?
  Yup. Often.
• Do you know anyone who may have committed suicide due to bullying?
  My friend's dad. He came out as gay. Yeah...
• Were you a bully?
  Yes. I stopped when one day I was harassing the kid; she broke down crying about how her parents were getting a divorce because he dad was sleeping around. Her brother turned 18 recently and had just ran off with his girlfriend. Her family was going under. The next day I came and said sorry. I stopped. We actually became really good friends after that, and to this day we trust eachother with all our woes and problems. And I gave up bullying and learned how to deal with the people who bullied me.
• How did you deal with bullying?
  I finally realized that if they judge me before knowing me, their opinions of me just don't matter. Anyone who was willing to know me wouldn't treat me like that and anyone who treated me like that would never know me.

Now I wonder I made sense :tard:

I was bullied when I was in school. I quickly learned that the adults weren't going to do anything about it. "Just ignore them," they'd tell me. (I remember one class in which the teacher was talking about problem solving, and told us, "You should never just ignore a problem. You need to deal with it!" and I asked, "So why do you guys keep telling me to ignore bullies?" and she kind of sputtered and didn't know what to say.)

It got bad enough at one point that they sent me to some "special school" for "misbehaving" after blaming me for somebody else calling someone something impolite (and a word that I had never even heard of at the time.) I rather resented that whole business.

The kids in high school constantly stole and hid my belongings from me, shot spitwads and threw gum in my hair, gleeked on me (and when I attempted to tell this to a teacher, they were like, "What's a gleek?") Ah, the 90s... My grandmother had to cut the gum out of my hair on more than one occasion.

It all finally stopped by my senior year in high school. By that point, I could just look at someone funny and they'd back away in terror. "Leave her alone," they said. "She'll cast a spell on you!" Yeah, I started pretending to "curse" people with bad luck, and enough of them were superstitious enough to think that whatever happened to them afterward was because of that that they'd just leave me alone. (One person even paid me to "bless" her pencil for a math test... and apparently got an A, too... heh.)

As for suicide... For one thing, that anyone is taking this as a viable option is a failure on the part of society in general. Likewise, in my opinion, that anyone, teenagers especially, actually following through on this idea is primarily a failure on the part of family. I've seen far too many parents bemoaning that their child committed suicide... after the parents ostracized them for coming out as gay. If a kid feels as though they cannot trust and get support and guidance from their parents, how can they feel as though they can trust anyone?

• What do you think causes children to act this way?
  School is a giant power struggle, and if you can become well-known and push back anyone smaller than you, then you gain more power. Many do it just to get more people on their side. However, the oddest thing seems to happen at our school. Any of the kids who bully others end up getting along really well with the teachers, even though they never go out of their way to be friendly.
• Why do you think teens and children feel better by ridiculing others?
  In their minds, it probably makes them stronger, or more self-confident, I'd imagine.
• If you are a child/teen have you ever went to a discipline teacher at your school and tell them your problem but they haven't done anything about it?
  It's never been my personal problem, but many people I know have gone to teachers who have done nothing about the problem. Sure, they pretend to, but really nothing changes.
• If you are an adult and have children have they had similar problems of teachers not doing anything about there bullying case?
• If you are an adult without children are you bullied at your workplace or college?
• What are some ideas you may have to decrease the number of suicides/ help the bullying problem? Have you ever witnessed someone being bullied and stood there and just watched?
  If we really want to end this bullying problem, we have to let the teachers know how the rest of us feel about the situation. Sadly, many teachers simply don't care. However, there are some that can understand the situation, but many are just that- teachers- and out principal couldn't care less. I've stood by and done nothing, but only because the minute you get involved, even in a positive way, you're made out to be a bad guy by the staff. Apparently we're ganging up on her, but all we're doing is protecting each other's backs. However, for some reason it's not seen that way, and we are chastised while the bully gets away with hardly a word.
• Have you witnessed someone being bullied and helped them?
  I have not. I deeply regret not doing anything in most circumstances, but again, the minute we speak up we're the bad guys.
• As a child have you ever been scared to go to school because of bullies?
  I've been reluctant to go, but not frightened. Just angry.
• Do you know anyone who may have committed suicide due to bullying?
  Not personally, no, but I've heard about plenty of people.
• Were you a bully?
  The only people who I've ever picked on would be my friends, who I've made sure are okay with it, and who tease me in return. I've never outright bullied someone.
• How did you deal with bullying?
  Passiveness, mainly.

The thing about bullying in our school is, we get so many speeches and presentations that all say the same, predictable thing. That we have to be accepting to everyone who walks into this building. But truth be told, no one is ever actually punished for something they did wrong.

It was back in sixth grade that we got a new kid. Her name, for this story, is S. S seemed really nice, and we were all more than willing to be kind to her. The first day with her in school was fine, as we all got to meet the new girl. But the second day... Well, I don't know what school she went to before this, but she acted like she had never met a popular kid before, never met people who had their own groups. And when faced with the slightest bit of exclusion after we had all gotten to meet her, something that would normally happen to everyone in the school (After all, we can't all be popular kids by Middle School, and the popular kids in our school aren't even mean to anyone 'below them'), she completely retaliated. By the end of the week, S had spit in a girl's face, insulted plenty of people, and teased a few groups of people so many times that almost all of us just tried to avoid her. Sure, this wasn't going to solve the problem, but the teachers clearly weren't doing anything about it, and what were we going to do anyways?

Now, two years later, the problem still persists. It still hasn't been solved in the slightest, perhaps even worse. The principal, disciplinarian, gym teacher, and a few other teachers seem to be her good friends now, despite what S has done to the rest of us. She's just an overall unpleasant and mean person, so we all try to avoid contact with her as much as possible. Should e accept her into our groups? Maybe, but not if she doesn't make an active effort to be kind to us. Because from day two, all she's been is snotty and rude. And I should know, I was the one who had to show her around school for the first week or so.

Keolah wrote: The kids in high school constantly stole and hid my belongings from me, shot spitwads and threw gum in my hair, gleeked on me (and when I attempted to tell this to a teacher, they were like, "What's a gleek?") Ah, the 90s... My grandmother had to cut the gum out of my hair on more than one occasion.

Gleeking is possibly one of the most disgusting, awful things you could do to someone. I was gleeked in the eyes once- an accident, with an immediate apology, but regardless still degrading. Since then we've had it banned from our school, but people still do it, of course.