MagiStream

Your Kirin is pretty much perfect, but your gryphon just seems "off" to me. I'm too tired to describe it, but hopefully you get what I mean. =T

Jongarakun wrote:but your gryphon just seems "off" to me. I'm too tired to describe it, but hopefully you get what I mean. =T

Saying that something looks "off" isn't helpful, i.e., if you can't write a good critique at the moment, it's often better to abstain from writing one at all, because such critiques only work to upset, not help.

The linework is nice and sleek for the most part but
1) It could use more shading, especially on the fur. Usually the folded wing is a relatively flat structure and the feather layers shouldn't case such dramatic shadows on the feathers behind them.
2) The wing seems to be positioned too far behind, there is way too little feather detail - you drew feathers on the outer margins of the wing but everything is a mass made of the same colour. The last fold (which forms the tip of the wing) is at an awkward position to everything that is in front of it.
3) The left hind paw looks smaller than the right, which is supposed to be behind the left.
4) I'm pretty sure the tail should begin a bit higher.

That's all for now, likely not very well-worded either, but I hope it helps a bit.
The Kirin looks promising, I'm curious about how it'll look when coloured.

As I said, I was tired. I hoped that that implied that I was going to come back and write a better review of it when I was less so.

I think the main two things that are getting to me are:
The face
The front legs

The front legs seem unnaturally stiff. You could really help it out by making them bend slightly. The face, though... it's mainly a problem with lineart. The beak looks like it's melded into the face too smoothly, without it jutting out the least bit. This could be fixed by working with the lineart a bit more, no real redrawing needed.

Alright, so when I did the gryphon, I wanted it to remain very simplistic- colors; lines; etc. But it seems that that's not hitting off so well, and since I wanted it to go in my store, then I'm just going to redo it from scratch. So keep a close lookout for more wip's if you are interested to see it change. This one I started from digital tablet; the new one I'll start on paper- as it's so much easier.

Anyways, all of that really doesn't mean much, I know... but here's what I'll say.


Thank you all very much for your honest critique. If you guys weren't honest with your critiques, I don't think I'd know there was so much to fix. I never liked this gryphon tbh, but my real life friends all said they loved it, so they forced me to not throw it away. But I think they just didn't want to hurt my feelings? *shrug*

No, I think it's a really good start for it, and it is simplistic and cute, but I'd love to see it if you re-did it to make it more realistic? Love the kirin though, keep it up

BUMP! Added a new picture- the Spectral Wolf! :3

It's easy to see that you're improving by leaps and bounds. The kirin lineart is STUNNING, I cannot find fault with it. The gryphon is good for starters, but it looks cartoony and simple. Not a bad thing, but it could be improved.

The Spectral Wolf is where your hidden talents start to shine through. It is anatomically correct, and it looks very real. I'd buy that art.

Thanks for commenting!

I'm actually very unhappy with that gryphon and have one redrawn, however I haven't digitalized it so it's not up here yet. Should be soon hopefully. :3

And yes, I'm ecstatic with that wolf. Now I've learned to sketch on paper then make it digital, my art has become much better. :3
Thanks again!

I have finished the Moonlight Spectral Wolves!

Let me know :3