MagiStream

It was a clear night, free of clouds, but filled to the brim and beyond with stars. A single white orb cast it's light down on three Creatures, all laying around in a huge castle. This castle was the home of the Magi's, and these three creatures belonged to one such magi. The creatures where laying out in a field, enjoying the nice quite night, when one, a Kuras Tiger named Gneral Keenclaw, called General for short, spoke. "I know we have been on the subject of where we all came from, and who we where raised by for a long time. The younger creatures pester us about it, and yet even we don't know where the other came from. I shall share with you what I know about who raised me, and how I ended up here." The other two, a Fire Gryphon named Keeper of the Eggs, or Keeper, and a young, Spinetail named Rhapture the fierce, or Rhap, listened closely.
"I know I was raised, maybe even hatched, by an older Magi by the name of Azunara. She's a kind, nice person. I loved being with her. I was one of her Guardians, just as she had trained me to do. But, I knew there was something more for me. I think she saw that, But I may never know for sure. I started prowling out of the keep, looking at other creatures. This is how I first met our young Magi. She was new here, exploring an older part of the keep. She had gotten lost, and had fallen down a small hole. She was carrying the egg she had found, a small one with creamy white wings and a small tail sticking out of the shell, very closely. I found her, sitting in the hole, unable to get out. She had twisted her ankle pretty badly. I raced off to find my master. It turns out, My master knew this little girl, They had come from the same village. It was my master who saw the magi in this young girl, and it was also my aster who saw how much I cared for this young girl. You remember the day I came, don't you Keeper?" General flicked his tail towards Keeper who nodded.
General went on, "It was a frightfully cold day, so cold, even you Keeper had trouble keeping warm. I remember Azunara walking down towards the young girl's room, with me following behind. Azunara knelt down before me, just as we got to The girl's room and said, 'General, You've been a good Guardian for me. But, I've seen how old you are getting. I've found a new Guardian, one with as much courage, as much strength, and as much loyalty as you. I know you wouldn't be disappointed with my choice. But, old friend, I've also found somebody who is willing to take care of you for me. I trust her with my life, since she's saved it a couple times. I know that's she's new, and young, but, I also know, that you shall be happy here.' and so Azunara opened up the door, and walked in. That's how I came here. Azunara was right too, I am happy here. I am an old tiger, but a happy one. I do not regret leaving Azunara, nor do I hate her for her choice."
General flicked his tail towards Keeper,"You have to say yours too." Keeper nodded, "Yes, but let's save that for another day. It' nearing midday, Rhap looks like he's ready to fall asleep, and I need to go check on the new gryphon hatchling." Keeper gently picked up the four eggs that where laying beside him, and put the in a special pouch that rested right on his breast plate. General gently picked up Rhap, who was nothing more then a kitten, even though he was classified as an adult, and walked padded after Keeper into the halls of the keep.




Please, tell me how I did. Post a comment!

Rhap yawned as Keeper groomed the newest addition to the hatchling group, a young little dragon. "How did you get here Keeper?" Rhap asked. Keeper sighed, and let the young dragon go, "If you really want to know, I don't have as an exciting one as General." Keeper said, flicking a great paw at the massive tiger who General strode into the room. "Who said my name?" General asked. Heaving a great sigh, General laid down, and rested his head on his massive paws. "I'm so sore, from trying to keep up with this ever constant flow of hatchlings. one set comes in, then grows up, a new set comes in, then grows up, and it repeats. argh, I need some sleep." General finished, and seemed to fall asleep. Keeper sighed, "Looks like it's gonna be one heck of a clean up tonight. I can't keep up with the flow either. nearly all of the new arrivals are covered in dust and muck from being out side. It's a pain just to track one down, but I still have to corner them, hold them down, and still clean them. I have to help the young master clean the keep tomorrow, for she got into trouble with The head Master, Belmos. Don't look at me like that Rhap, I don't know what she did, and I don't really have an interest in knowing." Keeper smacked Rhap on the top of the head, making Rhap look down. Keeper settled back down. "I'll make you a deal. I'll tell you how I came here, but, you'll have to track down the creatures who need to be cleaned, and clean them. Deal?" Rhap shook his head, "Deal."
"It was a hot sunny day, when I first met the young master. I was gifted to her, shortly after I hatched. I do not know who hatched me, nor do I have any regrets in not knowing. I was put into a box, and taken away from my parents, who I had just met. Then, the bow I was in was left out in a field. I think a week had passed, hot days, and cold nights, before somebody found me. It was our young master, just shortly after she came here. She picked my box up, and carried me off to an older magi. I think it was one of the teachers, but I'm not sure what His name was. He told our master that I was a fire gryphon, and how to raise me. I was our young master's second creature, her first was still an egg. When I saw her egg, I felt a feeling, a need, to care for it. So I did. I carried it in my beak, everywhere I went, which was every where out master went. When I was all grown up, and had a special harness, this same one I'm wearing now, made for me. With the harness, I can carry up to four eggs, and still have my beak and paws free to clean and groom the hatchlings who come into our master's possession."
Keeper sighed, "Well, there. I told you how I came here. Now, a dead is a deal. Here's the list of the creatures needing to be cleaned," Keeper pulled out a scroll from the bags hanging on the side of the harness, and passed it to Rhap, "I would suggest you get started. I need to sleep, I have to get up early and help the young master clean the keep." Keeper laid his head down, and watched Rhap race off into the halls of the keep, "I do wonder what our young master did to anger Master Belmos." Keeper muttered before closing his eyes, and falling to sleep.

Keeper flew high up to the ceiling of the main hall, the young master perched on his back. Down below, Keeper saw a flash of Gold, and a small squeak. Keeper looked down, and spotted Rhap holding down the newest hatchling, one given to the master by Tristan himself for the keep's third Anniversary. It was a small, scrawny thing right now, but it's song could stop the whole keep for a couple days. It's brother, was a bigger hatchling, who's song could only stop the people in the room. Keeper smiled, Rhap was gonna have a fun time trying to hold down the little one's brother.
Rhap picked himself up, and let the young Sonerus Dragon go. The hatchling raced off into the halls of the keep, probably off the go and try to hide her brother. Rhap pulled out the small scroll from the bag that was strapped to his side. Holding it with his tail, he slowly used his claw to cross off the female dragon. The next thing on his list was a Jaktus Dragon. Rhap shook his head, this was the last Jaktus Dragon he needed to clean, but this one was also the most elusive. The Jaktus Dragon, a male by the name of Akio, was a trickster. The dragon was using all of his tricks to get away from Rhap, even going so far as making Rhap nearly fall off the edge of one of the keep's balconies. Rhap looked up once, and caught Keeper looking down at him. The young master, was trying to clean a section of a high window, perched on Keeper's wing.
Then, a Puvia shot out from a nook in the ceiling, scaring the young master, causing her to wobble. Keeper tried to move himself so she fell back onto him, but he failed. The young master, fell off Keeper's wing. Keeper tried to dive down after her, but she was falling to quickly. Rhap ran to where he thought she was going to land. Oof! The young master landed right onto Rhap, who flattened onto the floor like a pancake. Keeper landed right down next the Rhap, "nice catch, pancake." He said, laughing. Rhap pulled himself up, and started laughing too, "That's a good one Keeper." The young master Got back onto Keeper, "You better go finish the list, before the next wave hits. I need to make sure our young master doesn't do a little tumble again. She might not have a cat-cushion there the break her fall next time." Keeper laughed, flying back up into the high reaches of the main hall. Rhap strode off, "a cat-cushion. That's a good one." he said, a good hearted laugh making his next task seem easier.

Rhap raced through the halls of the keep, the Jaktus Dragon he was after staying just ahead of him. On Rhap's left, a door opened, and the Jaktus Dragon flew through it, shoving the magi who was coming out onto the floor. Rhap stopped, and helped the poor magi up, giving a slight nod of an apology, then resumed his chase, trying to keep up with the speedy little Jaktus Dragon. Rhap came into one of the many entrance halls, this one was empty. Many doors stood open, any of which his quarry could have gone through. Rhap took a step, and was shot up into the air, a net entangling him. "Ahhh, shoot." Rhap mumbled.
Rhap fought for hours, the entrance hall remaining empty during the whole time. Then, and elderly magi walked out of one of the far rooms, and caught sight of Rhap, tangled in the net. The magi chuckled, "Well kitty, Shouldn't you be stuck up in a tree, not a net?" Rhap lashed his tail, which got him even more tangled. The elder magi came closer, and got a good look at Rhap, "well now, don't you look familiar. Your the young Spinetail that Miss Star has. Rhapture the fierce I believe your name was. Miss Star told me to just call you Rhap, should I see you. Sadly, I haven't had a chance to see you, even though I saw your Young master just yesterday. I should introduce my self, I am Master Belmos, the head of the keep. Now, let's get you untangled from that there net, young mister."
When Rhap was untangled, and his feet where touching the floor, Master Belmos gave him a short pat on the head, and stolled off into another hall, "By the way, that Jaktus Dragon you where after, I saw him flying up towards the roof top area. Looks like you're gonna go climbing." Belmos said, when he stopped to shut the door of the room he entered. Rhap sighed, "I'm going climbing...even though I'm afraid of heights, i will do this!" Rhap told himself. He took off, heading towards the only place where land creatures could get up to the nesting areas for the flying creatures: The Rock Wall.
When Rhap reached The Rock Wall, he had a moment of surprise. Sitting on a ledge just above him, was this Light Zalon. The Light Zalon was another one of the Young Master's creatures, but he was normally seen down on the castle grounds, not up here with the other fliers. "Hey, Zamba, Could you give me a lift? I need to get up there." Rhap called to Zamba, the Light Zalon. "Sure thing little buddy, I'll be right down." Zamba Backed up to the edge of the ledge he was laying on, and took off towards the edge, hurtling over the edge. Zamba flew down to Rhap, ad carefully picked Rhap up, "Where do you need to go, little buddy?" Zamba asked, being careful not to give Rhap to bad of a fright.
"I need to go up to where the Jaktus Dragons nest, there is one i need to clean up there." Zamba gave a chuckle, which scared Rhap, "You doing work for Keeper, Little buddy?" Zamba Laughed as he flew Rhap up to the highest tower in the keep, the place where the Jaktus Dragons normally nest. Sleeping in one of the smaller nests, was the Jaktus Dragon Rhap was looking for. Zamba carefully set Rhap down onto the floor of the tower, "If you need anything more, holler, I'm doing some work for Keeper myself, I have to watch the flying hatchlings for him, while he helps the young master out." Zamba called back, as he flew down to where the hatchlings where trying out their wings.
Rhap carefully walked over to the sleeping Jaktus Dragon, and pulled out a small sponge, and a bottle of soap. Rhap carefully got the sponge went from the small amount of water that was up here, and went to work cleaning the Jaktus Dragon. The Jaktus Dragon woke up before Rhap could get done, and thrashed about angrily. The Jaktus Dragon's tail hit one of the loose floor boards, which cause it to cave it, and the board took a couple more with it. Rhap was left standing on a every narrowing peice of flooring, the only piece for probably a couple hundred feet. The Jaktus Dragon manged to wiggle out of Rhap's grasp, and flew off. The shock of the Jaktus Dragon flying off made Rhap loose his balance, and tumble head first into the wide gaping hole which would probably kill him. Rhap tried to scream, but the rushing wind took his voice away.
A good ways down, Rhap landed with a thud. He pulled himself up, happy to be alive. The little ledge which had saved Rhap was nothing more the a place where a piece of stone got loose, came out some, then got stuck again. Rhap did not know how long it had been like this, but peering over the edge of his safety spot, Rhap still couldn't see the bottom, and he couldn't see the hole he fell through either. Rhap sat down, and dangled his tail over the edge. There was some noise coming from up above, it sounded like somebody calling Rhap's name, but he wasn't sure. Rhap sighed, and laid down as best he could on the small surface, and waited. Rhap hoped somebody would come and get him soon. If nobody came.....then Rhap might not get to see the light ever again. Keeper is so going to be pissed.

Keeper raced through the halls, his eyes full of fear, sweat streaming down his hide, Where Is Rhap?! Keeper skidded to a halt in front of a pair of huge, old wood oak doors, and hurriedly pushed them open. Sitting in a lounge chair in front of a roaring fireplace, with a temple cat laying on his lap, was Master Belmos. Keeper ran up to him, and nudged him gently in the leg, "What is it, my friend?" Belmos asked Keeper, who was too out of breath to talk.
When Keeper caught his breath, he quickly told Master Belmos, who knew how to speak magical animal language, That Rhap had gone missing. Master Belmos quickly stood up, "You mean the little Spinetail? I just saw him about 5 hours ago, he was caught in a net. I told him to go check the dragon nests for the Jaktus Dragon he had to find. That was the last I saw of him." Master Belmos turned away from Keeper, "Synitha, go find Akio, the Light Raiju. Tell her we have a missing Spinetail." Synitha raced off out the door, and Master Belmos sat back down, "You should go find you Light Zalon friend, Zamba, she was probably the last to see Rhap." Keeper raced out of the room, leaving Master Belmos to stare idly at the fire, worry creased across his face.
Keeper raced out onto the ledge and leaped, his great and powerful wing unfurling, flames streaming out behind like streamers at a birthday party, his massive front claws tucked under his fur, his head stretched out. Keeper flew out a ways, scanning the forest ground, but seeing nothing. He banked left, and circled around back towards the keep. As he got closer, the hatchlings, and a couple adults, who had not seen him fly before, dropped right out from the sky in awe. Keeper landed gracefully and the ledge where Zamba sat, "have you seen Rhap?" Keeper asked.
Zamba shook his head, "No, but I've heard the distress call, Master Belmos's Cardinal Gryphon, Sheepa, came and told me. I've been watching the fields and the entry to the forest. Some of our best flyers are searching the keep right now, but with all those hidden passage ways, it could take days. I'm sorry Keeper, that last I saw of him is when I flew him up to the Dragon nest, but he could have climbed down. It's quite easy to, on the east side." Zamba got up, and called out to a few of the adults out flying with the hatchlings, "Bring them in guy, we're gonna need you here soon!" He turned around, "I'll tell you if any of our flyers catch something Keeper." Zamba said, as he leaped off the ledge flapping his wings and went to join the round up of the hatchlings.

Keeper sighed. He lay in his bed, next to the young master's. General fidgeted in his bed near Keeper, whee he had been since he got back late last night. General would go and join the hunt for Rhap when he awoke. It's been two days since Rhap disappeared, and yet, the searchers haven't even made a dent in the known passages, and they haven't even started on exploring the rest. Keeper got up, circled around twice,laid back down, and closed his eyes, his tired body finally giving way to the irresistible call of sleep.

Rhap awoke with a fright, nearly going over the small ledge he sat on. He didn't know where he was at first, but then his memory came back to him. How long had it been since he had fallen down this hole? How long would it be before somebody found him? Rhap did not know, and the thinking made his head spin. He must have hurt it when he landed. Rhap laid down again, and looked up, hoping to see a familiar face come flying down to save him. Slowly, Rhap's eyes drooped, and soon he was asleep again.

This is very good! Dozens of questions are buzzing through my mind and I can't wait for the answers to them!

General Raced through the keep, a Solar Fox and a Tzunun Mouse following behind. They where going to meet up with Keeper, and a new Creature, a Ruan Vaether. The Vaether's name was Hyou, which the Vaether said meant leopard. General thought of it as funny, for She, the Vaether, was part leopard. When General and his group met up with Keeper and Hyou, Keeper was pacing, and Hyou was sitting, watching Keeper pace. Keeper stopped in front of General, "Is that all you could find to help?"
General nodded, "Yes, all the rest have been sent out on teams to search. Where did you say we where searching again?"
"We're going to the last place Rhap was seen, the Dragon's nest." As Keeper turned to the Tzunun mouse, and Hyou, a clicking noise came down the hall. Zamba followed shortly after, "Sorry I'm late." Keeper glance at Zamba, before turning back to the Tzunun mouse, and Hyou, "Nezami, Hyou, Zamba, You'll need to fly General and Taiyou up to the Dragon's nest." They fliers nodded, and lowered themselves for the riders to get on. Zamba, along with help from Nezami, Flew General up first, and Hyou flew Taiyou, the Solar fox, up after them. Keeper leaped into flight, and followed them up.
When they were all up there, the fist thing that was pointed out by Keeper was the weak floor, "Watch were you step, one wrong step and you could be falling down the hole." Keeper warned. Every body looked around cautiously, trying their best to not fall. But, Keeper knew one would, he just hoped that it was somebody who could fly. Keeper's hope came true, Nezami, the Tzunun mouse, stepped to close to the edge of a hole, and the floor gave way under her. She dropped some, but then she swiftly flew back up. She flew over, and perched on Keeper, "You might want to go look down there, I saw several blocks of concrete that had shifted, and hung over the edge, creating a really good ledge, big enough for a small to semi large beast to perch on. a larger best like Rhap might be able to sit on it, but it would be uncomfortable. But, It's worth looking down anyways." She whispered to Keeper, before she took to air again, and flew back into the hole. Keeper looked at everybody, "Stay here, and don't fall." He warned. Keeper took off after Nezami, flying down into the hole, using his fire as light.

Rhap looked up, as a light slowly floated down towards him, growing bigger and bigger. Rhap looked at the light, and realized it looked familiar. Suddenly, the light changed, and Keeper appeared, joy on the fire gryphon's face. "Rhap!" Keeper exclaimed, trying to land on the narrow ledge. Rhap was over joyed, rescue at last! Next to Keeper was Nezami, who was overly excited. She helped Rhap, as best she could, onto Keeper. Keeper flew Rhap out of the hole, and up to the waiting embrace of his friends. They filled Rhap in on the whole rescue effort, while Zamba flew down to go and tell Sheepa, Synitha, and Akio, to call of the search.

Very interesting. Minor spelling issues here and there, but altogether, a very captivating story. Keep writing!

~tufted

It had been several months now since Rhap's recovery. It had grown very cold outside, and snow blanketed the ground, many feet deep. Inside the keep, though it was warmer, everybody walked around bundled up. The creatures who had not gone south huddled together for warmth. Yet, even though it was so frightfully cold, joy radiated out of the castle. The holidays where coming soon, and everybody was either saving up, spending, or doing both. Well, almost everybody.
Keeper laid his head down, and watched his young master. The young master was in her bed, curled up under the covers. It appeared as though the young master was asleep, but Keeper knew better. The young master was greatly upset, for a couple days ago, she had tried to join in on the holiday fun, but she had been very rudely denied. by just about everybody. The few people who the young master did call friends are out of the keep for the holidays, so the young master had nobody to turn to for help.
Keeper sighed, and closed his eyes. His young master used to be so happy, so energetic, yet now, she wasn't doing much more then laying in her bed, too sad to even move. Keeper stood up, and turned around a couple times in his nest. It was so cold out, the Keeper's nest was super thick, yet the cold still crept in. Keeper grabbed some blankets in his beak, and pulled them over him, so he could at least attempt to keep warm. He was glad that the blankets where specially made so they wouldn't catch on fire. Keeper grabbed more blankets, and covered himself up more, so that the only thing sticking out was his beak, which kept the covers up so he could watched the young master, to make sure she didn't do anything stupid. After a little bit though, Keeper accidentally dozed off.
Keeper woke up a couple hours later to find the Young Master in the exact same place as she had been before. Keeper sighed, and unbundled himself from his nest. He has to check on the young master to make sure she's still alive. Keeper jumped up onto the Young master's bed, and used his beak to gently nudge at the young master's arm. The young master responded by reaching a hand out of the blankets, and grabbing Keeper's leg. Keeper smiled, and grabbed the covered in his beak, pulling them back a little as he climbed under the covers. When he was curled up next to the Young Master, the Young master put an arm over Keeper, and snuggled up close to the Fire gryphon, holding him like a teddy bear. Keeper chuckled slightly, and closed his eyes. After a little bit, Keeper was asleep.

Yay, MS story!

A tip, though, because to be honest, at the moment it's incredibly hard to read. You need to fix your formatting. Every time a new speaker speaks, you need to make a new paragraph.

If you don't know what I mean, you might want to check out the first part of my writing tips post, here. The "basics" section will help you figure out how you should be formatting your story so people's eyes won't hurt when they read it.

When that's done, I'm sure more people will check it out, because it sounds like you have a cool concept here.